La Hacienda Ranch Review
After being on the interstate all day, I was ready for some sit down food instead of the fast food fodder I had eaten all weekend. I had a craving for Mexican (what we Texans call Tex-Mex anyway) and a friend who lives in Frisco recommended this place.
Upon arriving in the parking lot, dozens of wooden signs written in a Texas drawl (yes…written) were plastered on most every pole indicating services they provided. Phrases like, “we ‘kin do katerin” did not inspire confidence and honestly made a bad first impression. The campiness à la Saltgrass/”what-a-Disney-Theme-park-might-imagine- a-Texas-ranch-would-look-like” continued inside. I’m a fan of Texas Eclectic decor style, but many of the items seemed like they were trying too hard.
I can say that what would have given this restaurant an extra star was the staff. They were very clean-cut, friendly, and helpful. It was a welcome bright spot in this otherwise dimly lit tour of mediocrity. However, not even the friendliest of staff could over come what was coming out of the kitchen.
A review of the menu revealed a very wide selection and an interesting blend of Tex-Mex and Americana. The steak selection looked decent, but the names added to the plates (i.e. “Trail Boss”, “Gringo”, “Bandito”, etc.) added to the over achieving atmosphere already. And to be honest, it’s not that original since a quick look at the TrailDust Steakhouse menu will show the same thing.
I ordered a water to start and was immediately concerned about my health. The lemon wedge in my water had obviously been cut with a knife used to prepare a meal since there was charred bits of meat and cilantro on it. I hoped this wasn’t a bad omen as I discarded it. The chips and salsa was decent but the queso was the real story here. My first bite outed this queso as supermarket fare (you know the kind you get in a jar in the chip aisle). The queso was boiling and the taste confirmed that it had just been microwaved. I’ve made better queso with velveeta cheese at home.
I decided to skip the obvious order of fajitas because honestly, it’s hard to screw up fajitas. No, I decided to test this restaurant with a higher standard and ordered the Bandito, a plate of beans and rice, two pork tamales, one cheese soft taco with queso, and one cheese enchilada with chile sauce. I tried the rice first and unfortunately the first bite tasted literally like dirt, another bad omen. I should know when to fold ‘em but I wanted to give the entrée its due. The beans were fair and the cheese items were very mediocre. The biggest disappointment, however, was the utter blandness of the pork tamales. It was perhaps the most tasteless thing I’ve ever had the misfortune of chewing on. The pork was simply squishy filling for a corn tortilla and even had bits of bones every other bite. I asked my friends how their dishes were and almost in sync, they each said, “it’s bland. Needs way more seasoning!” My friend’s chicken ranchero was bland, dry, and the vegetables again had that dirt taste to them like my rice. My guess is that they never clean of their vegetables, so use caution when ordering! My other friend had an “Americana” item with BBQ sliders (simply Hawaiian sweet rolls charred with a mediocre shredded beef). Even the curly fries that came with it didn’t even seem to have a chance at being salted or peppered.
We considered sticking around to at least try their “historic” frozen margaritas but we felt we had had enough punishment for one evening. Honestly, I was shocked because of the rave reviews this place had received. But you could easily save $30-$40 and go to Taco Cabana and almost be assured to receive better “Tex-Mex”. But if you enjoy paying for bland food, questionable health standards, dim lighting, and cheesy décor, then give La Hacienda Ranch a try…I hear they have great fajitas and margaritas!
